ANSWERS: 37
  • People I don't like, know I don't like them... even when I am polite. There is no ambiguity there.
  • Being two-faced means you don't respect them and are acting. But it's very possible to be polite and respectful while not liking someone.
  • I'm polite to just about anyone, even those I don't like; however, I am generally not polite to someone who has specifically wronged me in some fashion (however, I try to just avoid those kinds of people, since I don't like to be unkind and/or rude).
  • Being two faced is pretending you like someone when you don't. You can be polite to someone you don't like without liking them or pretending that you do.
  • There are close judgment calls in life, Jodie. And I'm sure you have done some yourself. If being two-faced means attempting to preserve the peace, no matter how fragile it is, then it's best to be two-faced. As it is, the terms "polite" and "two-faced" are very relative and subjective. What may be polite or two-faced to me may not be polite or two-faced to you. Since they are sujective, it is up to a person to decide which is which. If you're not comfortable with that, so be it.
  • I believe in diplomacy so I will tolerate someone I don't like up until the point that they haven't done something evil. If this person inflicts harm on others in any shape or form, I will immediately disassociate myself from him or her.
  • I think that if you are pretending to be friends with a person but in reality you don't like them, that's being two-faced. Being polite means you are civil and respectful without encouraging a closer relationship.
  • I'm polite to someone even if I don't care for them. I will not act interested in them or what they have to say, however. This is strictly on a personal level. In the political atmosphere of a company, I made sure I had a working relationship with others even though I didn't not like them. That means I didn't chit chat with them . . . only discussed matters of importance to the company.
  • Being polite is not something you should put restrictions on.
  • I am fairly straightforward, if I don't like you it is probably a fact we both know. If I am being polite to you, it is because I was raised to have good manners. Two-faced for me would be actually trying to pretend that I like you when in fact I can't stand you. Two-faced is going beyond polite with false compliments and feigned friendship.
  • Having good manners. That's where it stops. I wouldn't act like we were best buddies, but I am mature enough to use manners.
  • Being polite is being considerate of an other human. Being two faced refers put on a pretence that you like or support some while you are actively harming them through actions our deeds.
  • when you go beyond being civil and polite to showing affection towards that person. then it's two faced
  • Hi, Jodie..I think there is a huge difference between being civil and being friendly. Being civil is the polite thing to do..it makes life much easier on everyone around you. But being unctuous, flattering someone whom you really don't like..well, that is being hypocritical. I think being two-faced is being very sweet to the person face-to-face and knifing that person when his/her back is turned. Just distinctions for the way I see it! Happy Saturday! :) ((hugs))
  • I think it depends on what your reason is for being nice to the person you dislike.
  • Deception is being two faced. Politeness is just being nice. When my boyfriend and I broke up in October, one of his friends decided it was a good idea to add onto the pain by telling me he'd never liked me and only put up with me and was nice to me because I was his friend's girlfriend. In all reality, while you might say that I shouldn't get so worked up over this... he never gave me a chance. He offered me advice a lot. He went out of his way to be nice to me, it seemed. He let me read his stories. Well, maybe that was to get me to shut up and stop talking to him... I don't know. We argued over dumb things. I thought this guy was hot and had a good personality, and he rose his voice on me telling me that I liked that guy as more than a friend when I didn't. He told me he gave me hints that he didn't like me, but I'm oblivious to that sort of thing. We haven't talked since I told him to have fun in his self-righteousness and that he should have been honest in the beginning. He told me he was being honest now, so that was what mattered. No. That does not matter. He waited until it was convenient for him to tell me the truth and that's the way I view it. He also never told my boyfriend that he didn't like me. He was just nice for his sake. That's not cool, man. That's what I call being two-faced for convenience. If he was just nice to me and treated me as though I was a human being and stuff like that but didn't add on all those extras of giving me advice and sticking up for me and things like that, then maybe I'd view him as being polite. There are other situations I can think of like when my boyfriend, his best friend, and that guy and I were walking the same way and they were going to the mall near my house and I was going home... he was being nice to me and picking on my boyfriend. I don't get it. People are weird. Or maybe I'm just weird. He told me he's always thought I'm annoying and stuff like that. One of their friends invited me to a birthday party and yes, he did tell me we were friends.. but that guy said I was stupid and that I was only invited because I was my boyfriend's girlfriend and their other friend wasn't my friend or something. I found that pretty judgmental since he did tell me he wanted me to be at his party. I didn't end up going because I didn't want to be around my ex at the time. Well, now that we are together again, I wonder how he feels now. I hope he apologizes because it really affected me in a huge way. I mean.... he never gave me a good chance and I'm a good friend. Whatever. I don't need him. Right? He's just a fool and I don't have to prove I'm worth his time. If he can't accept me for me, then he's not a friend at all. He has this thing where you have to prove you're worth his time. Since when was he the decider of who is perfect or not? It bugged me so much whenever my boyfriend stood up for him until his best friend told me when he talks to me he sticks up for the other guy and when he talks to him he sticks up for me.Oh, well. He'll have to live with the fact that my boyfriend and I got back together and haven't broken up since. Again, that's what I call being two-faced. Being polite is when you are nice to someone, but don't fake being their friend like he did. You might say hi and ask them how they are and mean it, but you can still remain on an acquaintance level. This is a very good question. I hope my story wasn't too long or pointless for you.
  • I just know that it is best to just say hello and go on if you don't like them. Don't get involved in their life. Why be nice to them if you don't like them. The only way of being polite is just saying hi and bye and not get to know them. To me, that is a way to not be two faced. Being two faced to me is being nice to them in their face and then talk smack about them behind their back. That will only come back to you in the end and you will be the one who gets hurt in the end as you may hurt that person as well.
  • I think is short being polite is being mindful of someone else, being two face is advancing oneself at someone else's expense.
  • I think being polite doesn't mean you have to like someone or even pretend you do. You can be politely aloof. You can dislike someone, without being outright rude or impolite to them. I think bein two-faced means that you say you are a friend to someone to his or her face and then don't treat them as a friend when they are not around.
  • So let's say Mr. X shows up in my world, and I've got a judgment about him... "he's too pushy". So there's a conflict here between my idea of what honesty is ("I should tell him what I really think") and my ideas about courtesy and getting along with others ("If you can't say something nice, don't say nothing at all...") The reason this problem seems like a dilemma or conflict is that both of these "honorable" ideas have gotten DISCONNECTED from the real basis of values. That is, they're like little rules floating on their own private island, separated from the mainland of what really matters most... the continental shelf that makes all the pieces of life stick together and form a coherent whole. So what is the continental shelf they should belong to? It's your innate sense of being connected to others... a natural intuition that all healthy humans have (but we lose track of sometimes). That sense of connection changes the way Mr. X's behavior LOOKS -- his ordinary obnoxious behavior is still visible, but it's seen against a compassionate background, one which sees that he's still a human, and has suffered in his life, and this behavior is his ungainly adaptation to that suffering. In that spirit, the problem stops looking like a dilemma -- the question becomes "how can I be of service to this wounded but irritating bird?". In some cases, being polite will fit best, and in other cases, trying to have him see something about his behavior will be most helpful. The awareness of that connection is what helps us to see what will fit best in any given situation.
  • I believe that being polite is common practice and part of normal life you would show politeness to any stranger. It is only when you pretend that you are interested in being a friend to a person that you do not like that it becomes two faced.
  • I think the line is drawn when you start talking about the person behind their back. That's two-faced. If you're polite to the person and as soon as they leave start talking badly about them to the person standing next to you...that's two-faced
  • You don't have to like someone to be polite to them. You should be polite to everyone, that's merely good manners. But when you start saying conflicting things about the same person, good things to their face, bad things about them to others, then clearly you're two-faced.
  • Being polite means hearing what they have to say. Seeing how they live, what they deal with and go through. To acknowledge somebody just as they are is the greatest form of respect. Now, if they are interested to know you and they ask for your opinion, then you have the opportunity to speak to them. Out of consideration for them you can tell them what you think and believe. This is not dishonest or two-faced. This is just communicating. You never ever have to say that someone else is correct or incorrect. It is possible to simply hear them, and to state things about yourself. There is no conflict here.
  • Yes if you talk to the person with smiles and glee. When I don't like someone I just avoid any form of acknowledgment all together. I can't smile in someones face whom I do not like. I wouldn't talk to someone I did not like because, for what reason?
  • I like this question. Part of why you need to be polite is because you don't want to kill them, haha. So peace is better than war, yes that is right america, peace is better than war. You can still be forceful and polite.
  • normally, i do not mingle with any body i do not like to avoid being deceitful however i do not fancy my boss, so i am only polite to him cause i like to eat.
  • Being polite to someone doesn't mean you like them. There has to be a reason, co-workers, friend of a friend, neighbor, etc. You dont have to be a bitch.
  • Good question! The older I get, the less concerned about "polite"! ;-)
  • I think it's important to always be civil and as lacking in drama as possible. You can be diplomatic without being two-faced. I can't even relate the two. It's apples and oranges to me. I think you respect everyone because you must "Do unto others as you want done unto you"... If people don't keep up their end of the bargain, it's their loss to lose someone who is so consistently kind-hearted. IN that case, still civil, but stepping back enough to know your customer and not let anyone's negativity suck out the good you have to offer.
  • I draw the line.... Thats my secret... Politeness comes natural to me, I try to convey it across the board. Two Faced, nah, Id rather tell you and go to the box. I guess thats the difference for me.
  • For me the difference is that to be polite you have to be objective, and to be two-faced you just need to hate someone. You draw the line when you see that you are no longer objective. :P
  • Okay, I think there is a big difference between being only just polite to someone you don't really like and pretending to be really nice, indulging in deeper conversation and pretending to like someone that you don't...that's two faced.
  • being polite is just...courteous. being two faced should need no explanation either
  • What is in your heart?...Do you wish another ill will? Smiling and acting sweet, while wishing misfortune on someone...or waiting to silently laugh at them...or thinking that you are better than they are...are all signs of "betraying what's on your face"...or as you say..."two- faced"... Sometimes being polite is as simple as...just staying out of another's way...eye contact, a nod, or a civil "hello" can suffice in most cases...If not...try to find what it is that you don't like about that person...and take a good look inside...it's probably something about them that reminds you...of you!... ...I like this quote...by Wayne Dyer... ..."Neither ENTER Nor LEAVE a Room WITHOUT First.... .......Having DONE Some GOOD In It."........
  • Being two-faced and polite are two different thing. Having two facetted personality does not mean that one is aggresive at the same time and polite at the other. Being two facetted one can also be concluded as double standard. Polite on the other hand is a way of communicating . Sometimes it is in the nature of people to be polite on the other side some wants to make the conversation at ease by not getting aggresive. So it is easy to distinguish between the two.
  • Politeness is the lubrication that allows the social machine to function. Elementary courtesy is due even ones enemies. +5

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