ANSWERS: 16
  • No, because parents would never want their child to become obnoxious. BTW, I've already emailed you a short but sweet message hehehe.
  • I think a person's personality is set by about 9 or 10 years old. So parents really don't have much time to get it right but they have forever to live with the consequences of getting it wrong.
  • I believe that parents are responsible for 90% of the development of morality and manners in children. So not all, but most of the blame for a child being a "brat" rests on the parents.
  • no, the child is just learning about their environment and when they grow up they will be a lot different, whether good or bad.
  • I blame the parents :-) I'm sorry, I know its an easy answer, but the way a child is brought up makes a hell of a difference to the way they behave. Children are not born offensive or obnoxious, its something they learn.
  • Parenting has about 99% to do with it. Sadly, there's no mandatory course in parenting in this world... and there should be. The kid becomes responsible for his/her own actions when they turn 18... then, look out world.
  • I raised my son to be respectful with manners....and I would be shocked if anything came out of his mouth that was dis-respectful. He is 35 and has been the model of a good son.....and I would take the blame if he were to say something off color. Yes he has a mind of his own but since I taught him better I would assume I messed up somewhere for him to think it was ok to do it even once in a while.....only my opinion!
  • Hmm...it's like saying a child that sees abuse will they also grow up to be abusive? Can go both ways. Maybe they learned to be more loving. Maybe they learned to be abusive. I think if the child is bratty yes it's the parents make-up. But as an adult they learn for themselves.
  • How far? Very far. Extremely far. Really, really far. Parents lay the groundwork and set the example for the behavior of their children. Problems such as you describe should be nipped in the bud as soon as they surface, so that the question of whether the child becomes a good person becomes a foregone conclusion.
  • For the most part, yes. It is your job as a parent to teach your child manners and how to act in public places, and in the home when there are guests. It is your responsibility to ensure that you and others are treated with respect by your child. It is your responsibility to bring up the child as a civil human being. If done properly, you will have raised a child who would never be offensive or obnoxious, and would has the education and tools to be a responsible adult. This rarely results in your being popular with your child all the time, and that's fine. Children need parents, not adult friends. Kids will act out, will act up and be 'bad' on occasion. That's normal and to be expected, but you should have control over the situation. I've raised two children in this manner and both are respectable young adults. Each went through their own rebellious period, but it didn't overflow into the 'public' eye.
  • I would say the parents are only partly to blame. we have so many people in our lives that we are suppose to learn from teachers, preachers, parents, grandparents as well as uncles and aunts not to mention older siblings. our surroundings is made up of a lot of people who can make things hard. As parents they should never be fully responsible for how a child is raised.
  • My daughters 15 & I've raised her to be kind & caring. If at this age she wasn't that would be 100% my fault. I will take the blame for everything she does wrong but I'll also take the credit, lol
  • I wouldn't blame it all on the parent!
  • I agree with earlier answers that parents are responsible for bringing up a child well. It would be good, however, to hear an answer from a parent who birthed/sired a child who was a major problem despite his/her good parents' every effort. Children are born with a lot of "wiring" already in place - tiny babies, for instance, might be placid or irritable; irritable babies sometimes grow into difficult children. Some kids, from birth, are far more stubborn than others, much more inclined to rage than others, etc. If you've had no children yet, or if you were blessed with kids who responded to ordinary consistent enlightened nonabusive discipline/rules, then hold a charitable thought for parents of really, really difficult kids. Twenty years ago I had friends whose son was a diagnosed sociopath. They sought counseling and did everything they could. The shrink said, "He won't stop acting out. Sociopaths don't. They just 'burn out' and settle down some in their forties or fifties. I am as bothered as the next person by bratty kids, but we don't always know what the parent is facing. This is a case of not judging unless you've already "walked in that person's shoes."
  • This is an excellent question LL. Parenting provides the guidelines and can give a young person direction. Parents can put their children back on-track once they take a wrong turn, but there comes a time when the child must choose their own direction. Peer influence is a problem, but the parents have some control on this from an early age. In my opinion, the majority of the problems with today's youth is a result of bad parenting; however parents cannot take all the blame for some children.
  • In the formative years, a child 'learns' how to fit into his or her world....this means shaping behaviour to get positive feedback and approval, and avoid punishment. So, during this crucial time, a child learns behaviour, values, expectations, and a host of other things from primary caregivers. Influences spread as time goes by...school,being a biggie. If a child is familiar with people who are rough talking, for instance, they will seek out friends and cohorts with whom this is a common trait....we are drawn to that which is familiar. And that trait is reinforced. If a child is bullied at home....guess what....chances are he will be a bully too. Monkey see...monkey do. Choice to change comes in later. If a child/youth/adult experiences an environment which has different values, behaviours, expectations...then he/she can assimilate some or all of those and choose to make changes.

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